i am afraid.
i live in fear.
fear has become my roommate, my companion.
before i was terrified of naming it,
but what is the use of lying,
pretending that what is there isn't.
what is the use?
i fear that i will be like the women in my family
women who give so much of themselves to others,
who are successful, but
are women without love.
i fear that i will become like them
be left alone.
i don't want to be alone.
i don't want to endure life with walls surrounding
and no one willing nor capable to penetrate them.
i fear that i am not good enough,
that i am insufficient,
that i lack,
that i will never be the one
that is chosen.
that is loved.